Mupdates, Week 2 Term 1 – “Who are you? Why don’t you fuck off?”
Mupdates – Back
Mupdates – Will be better next week
Archie – Bad at writing Mupdates
Pre-PCP
Meetings – 2 too many
Tanmay – Late
Exec – Half missing
Gerard – Authoritarian
Gerard – Loves himself
Freshers – Keen for tour presentation
Way – too many of them
Price – Unknown
Price – Fucking spenny
Worth – it
Laurie – Forgot to record it
Archie – Is happy to expose him
Josh – add it to exec punishments
PCP + Tables
Carling – tastes like shit
Purple – was a rouge choice by some
Tom – Fucking good at pool
Tom – Had Alfie’s pants down
Randall – Has done that anyway
Gambles – Written
Archie – Bricking it
Olly – Entrusted with the dress
Olly – left the dress
Archie – didn’t want to wear it anyway
Olly and Harry – Table bitches
Jimmy – Missing
The lads – Missing jimmy
Bouncers – Didn’t like us
Us – Shit scared
Bouncer – Watching over our circle
Reputation – Tarnished
Boxers – Ruined
Purple – Smelt
Smelt – Gorgeous
Staff – Untrained
Update – Archie still bricking it
Hockey Lads – Wankers
Shit – Blokes
Sh – club
Boat Race – Time arranged
Confidence – High
Tables – Fucking easy
Golf – Tables taken
Archie – Lied to their faces
Golf – None the wiser
George – Don’t tell them
Some Prick – Tried to take a table
Get – Fucked
Bin – Secured
Tables – Dangerous
Bricking it – Archie
8 – o’clock
Lads – Arrived
Purple – Poured
Poured – Fucking slowly
Gone – Eating at Warwick
Price – Increased
Laurie – Livid
Circle – Session 1
Freshers – Mixed in
Essex – Not happy about it
Archie – Fidel
Time – 8:20
Get on – With it
Tables – Smacked
Screams – Heard
Gentle – men
Woos – Wooed
Everyone else – Staring in awe
Us – Fucking great blokes
Uniform – Plenty
Archie – Disappointed
Trainers – Loads of them
1, 2 – 3, 4, 5
Muppet – of the week
Dress – Somewhere in T-Bar
Archie – nominated for being in wales instead of CR2 in Week 1
Sheeps – Shagged
Rishi – Nominated for starting too many scraps
Rishi – Single
Archie – Double
Archie – Out of practice
Archie – Lost pretty badly
Happy – To not be wearing the dress
Ay up – me duck
New – Game
What – do we do before we play a new game?
G – amble
Gamble – F1M
Archie – Forgot who pulled it out the pot
Told you – I was bad at writing Mupdates
New Game – 20+1
Dan Tennant – Picked on
Sadly – He has learnt how to start a game now
20+1 = 21
Actually – Got to 21 on the first try
Archie – Was surprised
New rule – Course Chains
Economics – Very popular
Wacking – Half the circle
Single Numbers – Said 4 times
Courses – Morse, Biology, Politics, Economics
Economics Lads – Heartbroken
Wacking – 3/4 of the circle
Archie – Must be doing something right
Fresher Will – Thought 1 came after 6
Fresher Will – Is a fucking idiot
Love – him really
Fresh Coma Patient – Has fallen asleep
Fidel – Not having it
Scared – Of the bouncer watching us
Next Gamble – At the races
Half the Circle – Wacking again
Pints – Refilled
New Game – Redacted Splat
Olly – Fucking ruthless, destroyed a fresh out the gate
Rudy – Destroyed a fresh also
Laurie – Same fresh later on
Rudy – Bored and wanted more
Not – Surprised
Rudy – Subbed in for the fresh that was losing
Great – Bloke
Soberman – Eitan
Mistaken – For a roided toddler
Purple – Would’ve disappeared faster if it was left to evaporate
Eitan vs Fresh – mexican wack off
Mountains – Have moved quicker
Why – did people back eitan
What – did you expect
Wacking – 90% of the Circle
Recess
Called – very Early
Tables – looked empty of pints
Archie – Checked with bouncer we weren’t breaking the rules
Bouncer – Couldn’t give less of a shit
Archie – Convinced they mixed us up with hockey last week
Archie – Furiously writing some notes for mupdates
Not – That it helped
This is shit – I’m aware
Session 2
Gamble – Super
00 – Lightning arm thrown forward
Nominate – Uberphaal
Club Meal – Next week
Tom Dallmeyer – Whispering sweet nothings into 00’s ear
Fresher coma patient – Dallmy’s target
00 – What a man
Nominated – Dallmy
Cheers – Massive
Cunt – What a
New Game – BBW
Freshers – Figure it out already
Olly – “Embaraazzing”
Rogers – Got it wrong
I love you – Baby
Sharky – Would’ve been so proud
Circle- belting it out
Was – Glorious
Gamble – Forgot what it was
Darts – Was the new game
Bin – Not hit
Misses – many
Pints – Many
3 – Max hit by any team
Cricket – We shouldn’t be playing it at this rate
Gamble – Haven’t a clue, will write them down straight away next time
New Game – Fielding drills
Rules – Not known, had to be explained many times
Rules – Now known
Confusion – Still not ended
Why? – Silly hockey fresh trying to get round the back of our circle
Olly – Roadblock
Boos – a’plenty
Roadblock – Was pretty shit, he gave up and the hockey fresh squeezed through
Essex – “Who are you? Why don’t you fuck off?”
Friendly – No
Fresh – Thought he had a massive cock
Fresh – Angry
Fresh – Tried to knock out Essex (reasonable)
Fresh – Held back
Fresh – Was a cunt
Cunt – he was
Archie – Called over our watchful bouncer
Bouncer – Now our mate, pinned him up against the wall
50 – shades of gray
Cunt – Wanted none of it, still wanted to scrap essex
Circle – started cheering
Archie – In fidel fashion, told everyone off as we didn’t want to get in the shit with mark again
Mark – Turned up
Circle – got on with the game as best as we could
Pints – Drunk
Bin – missed again
Olly and Laurie – Unbelievably bad at it
Cunt – Whisked away by mark and bouncer
Cheeri – o
Boat race – not happening anymore
Hockey – pulled out of it
Not – Shocked
Gamble – ?
New Game – Cricket
Rules – Not known
Score – 48 in good old Warwick Fashion
Doubles – Done
Session 3
New – Game
Reverse – Sherwin – Ball
Game – was a shambles
Noise – too much, couldn’t hear
Olly – Wanted to be the last man
Olly – Doubled
Eat – it
New Game – One Fat Frog
Again – Shambles
Fuck – that game
Alot – of drinking
Time – 10:35
Mini – Circle
Remaining – The good fellas, about 8
Game – 20+1 roman numerals
Jimmy – glad he wasnt there
Wack – and Leave
Fresher Coop – Impressive performance
Was it enough? – No
Fresher coop – Left
Rogers – winner
POP
Megamix – Fucking Class
Bennett – Wasn’t there to mess it up
You are – My fire
Jeru – shalom
Rubs – Hunted
Eitan’s Housemate – Olly stewart
Scrapping – Eitan, probably
Archie – Missing his weekly vks with Jabez
Olly Stewart – Another one bites the dust
Queen – Cracking band
Holly – Had Olly on a lead
Olly – Wanted to propose again
Holly – Already has a boyfriend
Viallis – Were still bought for her by Olly
Harry Rogers – Doing Harry rogers things
Nuff – Said
Absolute – Mess
Ralli – Doing Ralli things
Nuff – Said
Mess – Absolutely
The story of the President, a tale of early nights, love and a lot of chun
Josh – Not my President
POP – He wasn’t enjoying it at all
Quote – “It’s shit now that I’m in a relationship”
Bus – Was there for the taking
Archie – Was too sober
Both left – Poor example from the senior clubmen
Josh – A load of waffle about how much he loves poppy, quite cute actually
My Heart – Warmed
Bus – At the church, the clean sound of a semi-hard liquid hitting the floor from a few feet off the ground rang in our ears
A state – Some random 2nd year behind us
Josh – “I’m so gonna chun”
Tachbrook Bus stop – He’s given up and the pressure has got to him, we make our way down the steps and out the bus so that Josh can chun
Chun – So fucking much of it, never seen anything like it
Poppy – Rang josh, has left her house to take him back
Josh and Poppy – Reunited once more, could’ve fooled me though. Look like fury vs wilder IV the way he was barging into her as they walked off, almost sent her to the floor
Stella – Possibly drunk
Archie – Full of sympathy for Poppy
Josh – Spewing all night supposedly
Well done lads x
Bring on club meal