An availability crisis almost unheard of since last season (any of exams being planned around the cricket season) meant that a very weakened third eleven travelled to Worcester. An early start and a cramped bus are staples of Warwick away days, and this was no different with the boys hitting the road at 8:45 sharp with their knees touching the seats in front. We arrived before the opposition at the out-ground, and were instead greeted by a building site in gorgeous weather. On a day when all odds were against us, the lads were still excited at the prospect of what could have been some of their final BUCS games for the club, so a big performance was in the offing. Stand in skip Cal lost the toss again, and we were sent into the field. Mallows, Mez, Owen and co. were all having flashbacks of Trent, but the bowling attack really stepped up, with few loose deliveries between openers Mez and Seb for the batsman to cash in on, forcing them into loose drives and dangerous shots. One of the openers had come out to bat with a pitching wedge rather than a bat, intent on chipping the ball just over the heads of multiple fielders. Neither bowler got the breakthrough though, that came when Sharky yorked the aggressive batsman just after drinks. A few balls later no. 3 was in the shed, bowled by Shiv. A steady partnership formed after this, and a big score once again loomed. Cal turned to his wildcard, the big O himself. The gamble looked about as good as a double gamble wack when his first ball pitched closer to him than the batsman, and then a huge wide was sent down. What followed surprised everyone in Worcestershire, Owen delivered a ball that drifted away, and turned sharply clipping the off stump and sending back the very handy captain. A squeeze followed, with Arunav proving particularly difficult to get away (7-2-18-0) and was unlucky not to pick up a wicket. Steady wickets then fell, with a superb run out from Seb the real highlight, with Ivan, Owen and Shiv cleaning up numbers 5-9. Number 10 was literally the best batsman in the team and I have no idea why he didn’t open he was a gary ton, inspired from the skip? Luckily the boys kept him off strike, and Essex took a nice diving grab to his left to finish the innings off the bowling of Seb. We had restricted them to only a fractionally above par score of 222. Double Nelson. Half time was full of discussion, what was being built right in front of us? Did they have enough on a good deck with a short boundary? And what has Fraser done to get his arse to look so peachy? A gun tea was provided, but it had meat in literally everything (sorry to those veggies – don’t exist in this part of the West-Midlands clearly). Mallows and the F Dog opened up, and Mallows rode his luck early by snicking his 2nd ball to first slip, only for him to go full David De Gea and miss it with his feet. Unfortunately for Mallows, just 2 balls later he snicked it to the slightly safer keeper who made no mistake. See ya. Seb came and went, bowled on the drive to the very handy opening bowler. Sharky came in and delivered some lusty blows on his way to an attractive 11, but ultimately his aggression cost him as he was trapped LBW to one the just nipped in. In came Essex, one of the senior batsman in this side who had decided he needed protecting from the new ball so he could excel and take the boys to the finish line. His innings consisted of: a top edge to get off the mark, getting genuinely bounced and shitting himself, hitting a four, getting the exact same half tracker outside off and hitting it to slip. Muppet. Fraser was meanwhile watching the carnage from the other end, and was solidly prodding and poking his way to a decent score. Skip came and looked good before playing across a straight ball and being out plum LBW, and Owen came on to score a BUCS run to add to his Amogh-esque collection of 3. Shiv nudged one back to the bowler and the boys were reeling at 67-7 when Ivan came to the crease. Him and the F Dog patiently built before the F-Dog had to depart, once again caught and bowled for a really solid 27. It was however the most boring thing any of us had ever seen, rumours Fraser was bragging about how if the outfield was shorter he would’ve hit two fours on the coach home to add to his 0 he did actually hit. Just speechless. Ivan was bowled for 21 leaving the boys 106 ao, Mezza the not out man on 0*. The journey home wasn’t dour however, early doors the lads encountered a Malvern College bus and Essex went full Sharky against hockey at circle, before being told the bus had one 6 year old girl on, and our bus driver was verbally abused by a member of the public for questionable work on a roundabout. All in all, a heavy loss but not one without positives for a squad very low on BUCS experience, we go again next week where everyone who has ever googled Warwick Davis is rumoured eligible to play 3s