Jug – location for PPCPP (pre pre circle pint pint)
Tasty and J$ – arguing over the need for the final pint
Tasty – correct in his argument that it should only by PCPP
Tasty – outnumbered
Bexson – taking control of the gamble pot
Gamble pot – looking like a dangerous night to take the plunge
J$ – the brainchild of the inverse purple
Inverse purple – pint of concentrated squash topped up with beer and cider
U1 – packed
Nikhil – already chirpsing, laying the groundwork for POP!
Badcock – still the talk of the club with his massive testes
Hall – “my second team umpire had his testes surgically reduced and they are still massive”
Badcock/Umpire brain relay – a frightening prospect
Bexson to Hall – “with the size of your piece, have you ever truly been balls deep?”
Hall – answering with a sheepish smile
Tasty – “how can you have a shlong and still not be able to windmill?”
Hall – unlikely to gain membership to the elusive windmilling club any time soon
Nikhil – ditching the chirpse and joining the clubmen on the top floor
Bexson – not just a hat thief, having stolen numerous different clothing items over his time
Bexson – “I’ve even got a Harrow games staff jacket somewhere”
J$ – “Bexson is a pikey”
U1 – eventually making it to campus
PCP – a slow build up, with a few new fresh faces
Fresher Curtis – making his first appearance after promising at Neon on Friday (before getting sent by Jäger)
Fresher Tim – arriving in time to see Tasty lose his second pre-circle pool game ever
Fresher Tim – definitely Tasty’s bad luck omen
Tasty – selecting Turner to help set up circle after Cheeky’s disappointed performance last week
Cheeky – still not grasping the concept of time and not even at PCP
Snakey and Goodyear – managing to snag some last minute tickets
CR2 – dead, tables easy to come by
Scheming – J$, Tasty and Larks trying to establish who should nominate Bexson
J$ – “well it should definitely be Merriman”
Merriman – would rather board the Express back to Leam than betray his president
Merriman – club legend in the making
Turner – eventually decided as the scapegoat
UWMCC – anticipation building up, ready to take a trip on the HMS Sesh
MOTW – as per usual
Merriman – nominated by Murphy for attending a Halloween event as Cinderella citing the reason as “he obviously likes to wear dresses”
Murphy – obviously not aware that everyone is a special snowflake…
Fresher Joe – nominated for rogue antics at his 21st birthday on Monday. Having started the sesh at 5pm in Tbar with Tasty, he continued in his kitchen with some G+Ts before eventually departing for Leamington for the Halloween bar crawl. 5 bars and many beverages later, Joe is texting Tasty, asking where the nearby house party saying, “I’ve got the weed, I’ll bring it and we can get fucked.” Tasty, always up for a big one, replies only to have Joe’s housemates reply. Sadly, Joe had to be carried home and then showered off by his male housemates. On the plus side, he did admit his love for Tasty.
Bexson – nominated by Turner for bleaching his hair. Although often a point of debate, new evidence was bought to light last POP!
after Kate showed Clayden, Tasty and J$ a picture of a young, brown-haired Bexson.
Bexson – the clear winner, although still adamant that he doesn’t bleach
Bexson – wacking to the tune of “Bexson dyes his hair, dyes his hair, Bexson dyes his hairrr!”
New game – Premier League Darts
Gamble – Bozza – too close to call
J$ and Hall – the contenders
Most people – backing Hall
Tasty – also backing Hall, sitting cross-legged in circle despite the purple pools
J$ – sending Hall in the race
Bozza – with 12 to nominate, picking the usual suspects of Jezza, Murphy and Merriman to wack among others
PLD – team led by Bexson against Roach’s warriors
Roach’s team – victorious
Murphy – 180 to nominate, ends up sending a fresher and stitching himself
Bexson – finally unable to blame his team for the loss having missed the shlot
Bexson – obviously restricted by the dress
Game 2 – a fierce contest between J$ and Larkins
The rules – only trickshots allowed
Fresher Arjun – not starting after thinking Tasty is on his team
Accuracy – Phil Taylor would be horrified
Victory – larkins team after Tim sends one with his eyes closed
CR2 – more atmosphere than Ally Pally
New game – Roman Numerals
Gamble – Roach – Double Vodka Buca!!!
Roach – dismayed
The cloudy mixture – a familiar sight for Bexson and Tasty
Roach – sending the dom tour concoction with obvious difficulty
Roman Numerals – off to a decent start
Fresher Arjun – not quite grasping the rules, getting kimmed by the first round
Fresher Arjun – immediately losing for a second time
Larkins – “do you not know the numerals?”
Fresher Arjun – “…no”
Fresher Arjun – avoided in all further rounds
Larkins – making a devilish rule, switching I to V with XIII to XVII
UWMCC – dumfounded, unable to complete another round
Fresher Joe – cocking up numerous times, in obvious trouble
Tasty – announcing that the next person to fuck up will be doubling
Fresher Joe – the unlucky recipient, quickly running to the toilet after the double attempt
Fresher Joe – cheerio
Tasty – “we are going to play a game of Tinderrr”
Roach to Tasty – “its been a heavy first sesh, maybe we should play something else”
Tasty – pondering the advice of Roach
Tasty – “we are gonna play a game of…………… TINDER!!!”
Choppy (in spirit) – “Oi Roachy, get fucked!”
Gamble – non Iphone Double
Cheeky, Larkins and Merriman – obviously backwards
Tinder – regular collusive behaviour, especially from J$
Tasty – sitting next to J$ and purposely kimming him in round 2
New rule – Super Like
Super Like – everyone stands and points at someone. If anyone is pointed at, they must wack but if people point at each other, then
they must both doubling
Super Like – not producing any matches
UWMCC – obviously shit at Tinder

1st Recess

Tasty – already struggling with memory recall
Mupdates – expected to be a myth
Fresher Joe – looking worse for wear
Cheeky – continuing the recent trend of being absolutely sent by 2nd sesh
2nd session – commenced
Tasty – “anyone not signed up to Movember shall be wacking”
J$ – “what if they sign up now?”
Tasty – “then they shall be wacking for phone in circle”
Tasty – power hungry
New game – Cricket
Super gamble – Larkins – nominate 3x inverse purples (diabetics excluded)
Hall – loving the clubs new sense of Diversity and inclusion
J$ – pumped to see his baby in action
J$ – nominated
J$ – “fuck”
Goodyear and Turner – to join J$
Inverse purple – literally diabetes in a cup
Cricket – fairly standard… and by standard I mean gash
Tasty – informing the club that everyone will be wacking if all out for less than 100
Bexson – purposely kimming the club on the final wicket
Bexson – Shit cunt
Final score – 60 all out
New game – ICICN
Gamble  – Hall – serenade a girl in circle
Hall – managing to eventually get a Ladies hockey girl into circle
Hall – hitting her with a magical rendition of ‘I want it that way’
The girl – obviously in love
ICICN – some standard cricket based questions
Hall – threatened with a double if he asks about Irish cricketers
Hall – instead asking for Scottish cricketers
Hall – boring and made to double
ICICN – people to have lived in a cricket house
J$ – managing 14
Hall – ICICN Asian countries… and Irish cricketers
Hall – almost as unbearable as Murphy
Larkins – ICICN cluedo weapons, people and locations
Roachy – claimed on 12
Tasty – threatening to piss in Roach’s pint if he doesn’t get any
Cluedo – obviously a passion of Tasty’s
Roach – “well there’s the Gazebo…”
UWMCC – hysterical
Roach – “the Gazebo exists in my version”
Roach – obviously playing some shitty Northern cluedo
Roach – eventually wacking after claimed that there is a Colonel Green
Larkins – “it’s Colonel Mustard you cunt”
New game – 1 dice
Gamble – Chemist’s 1 minute challenge
Snakey – trying to claim that a Masters in Polymers isn’t chemistry
Snakey – made to wack nonetheless
Target – 10 pints between 4
Target – achieved
Bozza – disappearing into the toilets
Larkins to Bozza – “did you just TC?”
Bozza – “nope, that was just a C’
1 dice – once again an excuse for Tasty to piss
Circle – in disarray and chaos upon Tasty’s return


2nd Recess


UMWCC – the obvious messes of CR2
New game – 1FF
Snakey – disappointed with the lack of fat slags
Gamble – Roach – Deconstructed triple
Roach – “I’m not paying for that shit”
Fresher Joe – willing to pay for the triple as long as he could also add a shot of Sambuca
Roachy – foolishly pouring the Sambuca into a pint of purple
Tasty – forcing Roachy to drink it
Deconstructed Triple – becoming the Deconstructed quad
Bin – taking an absolute battering
Roach – managing his way through after a combination and drink and chun
Chanting – Roachy taking the same time to down the quad as the club took to get through a rendition of German Bombers
Cheeky – throwing more chairs into circle, made to wack
1FF – standard, obvious confusion among the new fresh
New game – Sherwin Ball
Gamble – Freshers FA Cup
Turner – stepping in as an 8th fresher to make up the numbers
Marcus – the eventual champion
Sherwin Ball – very well done considering the state of most men
New game – Speed 20+1
Gamble – quite frankly, I can’t remember (not even sure we did one)
20+1 – a good way to finish off remaining pints
Stupid Fresh – remaining on the table despite having no pints
Tasty – quickly dismissing them from circle
Arjun – managing to buy more pints despite the bar being closed




Megamix – looking dismal
UWMCC – eventually grouping in Rouge bar
Megamix – gun in the end
UWMCC – using this POP! as a last chance to steal some hats prior to next weeks stolen hat circle
Turner – successfully acquiring a hat 5 minutes into POP!
Tasty – leaving POP! at 12:15
Tasty – “I know when I’ve reached my limit”
Bexson – suspicious of Tasty’s reasoning for disappearing
Roach, Turner and Nikhil – almost brawling with Rugby on the NU1 home
Tasty – tucked up in bed
Kate – calling up Tasty, citing a massive argument with Bex and demanding he come get her from POP!
Bexson – calling Tasty, also claiming the weekly domestic had occurred and asked if Tasty could come to the Den to console him
Tasty – good bloke as ever, gets changed and runs (surprise I know) to the Den
Argument – all a massive ploy to see whether Tasty had gone home with a girlweek-5-1
Kate – “I heard you panting on the phone, you were definitely having sex”
Tasty – innocent
Tasty – fuming
Tasty – consoling himself the only way he knows how to… by watching Surprise Jihad videos with Snakey
Snakey – loving Surpise Jihad videos, almost certainly spending all of his spare time watching them now
Revelation – Bexson and Kate did have a domestic as per
Kate – dropped her bag in Sicilians and asked Bexson to pick it up for her
Bexson – dropping Kate’s pizza in reply and demanding she pick it up
Stalemate – intense
J$ – eventually picking everything up to avoid blows
Bexson – still laughing at Tasty for coming to help him
Tasty – good bloke
Bexson – cunt

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